The thing I wanna know is, if I went through with the sex change operation, would that make me a lesbian? Cause I’m not sure how my parents would react to that.
With all the salt in the ocean, you’d think that the fish would come out already preserved.
If I could be part cyborg, I think I’d have hydraulic eyeballs that pop out. I think the girls would be really impressed if I could perform cartoon like antics when they walk by. I also need to have an expandable jaw that can reach the floor when appropriate. I can’t wait for future technology.
I’ve come to a startling discovery. The world is full of a lot of incredibly stupid people. I would have to say that there’s me, and maybe about, three or four dozen people I know that aren’t morons. It’s sad really. Especially if you’ve looked at my site for more than 11 seconds, and realize that I’m the cream of the crop. We’ll have blown ourselves up long before any aliens get here.
It seems to me, that any man who holds a tea cup with his little pinkie extended, is just asking to have it broken off.
I think the most important thing if you have a pet tree is, you should always walk it regularly.
Tomorrow I buy myself a copy of New Found Glory’s LP, From the Screen to Your Stereo, arguably the best love ballad punk covers disc ever. The Glory of Love, with some killer punk rock riffs. Yet another album for my “miscellaneous” section.
It’s hard to believe that just last year I was single, living with my parents, and…oh crap.
Hi, my name is Joel, and I kinda like Alanis Morissette. Hey, she’s hot!
I bought this cereal the other day. It was supposed to make me feel energized, help me take a bite out of life, make the most of every day. The back of that box was pretty inspiring. I thought I was gonna go out and turn my life around. I thought things would be different from now on. I thought nothing could stop me, cause I was feeling good about myself, I was confident, I was looking good on the inside. As I was walking to the bus stop, I stepped in dog crap. I guess that goes to show what the word of Kellogg’s is worth.
Self-depreciating humour only works if you’re kinda pathetic. You might say it’s like being in an exclusive club. Hmm, nope. I still sound like a loser.
Don’t you girls hate it when you’re walking along and all of a sudden your shirt falls off? Well I don’t.
I'm learning a new language. L337. Also, I'm working on the online symbolism, such as :) the happy face, ;) the sly cool face, and that constipated face, how do you do that again? Cause I forget to eat my Bran Flakes today.
Speaking of too much information, check the archives. What, like you need a reason?